... Bad News Last.

Please, brace yourselves. I almost had a tear in my eye when I read the next two stories, so you have been warned. Everything horrible and materialistic and unoriginal in Hollywood has now come true, and these stories are just another indicator that Hollywood will flush out anything for a buck.

First up, the horror known as Mission: Impossible 3 is now suddenly seen as "hot", what with JJ Abrams's star now on a huge rise because of the success of Star Trek (he directed both movies). In MI3 Tom played a married to Michelle Monaghan Ethan Hunt who has to rescue his former protege (Keri Russell) and face the ultimate bad guy (Philip Seymour Hoffman in another horribly miscast role). They threw so much in that plot that I thought it was physically impossible to construct another because they had literally done everything. When you're watching the movie, at one point you think it's done but then you realize you still have another 45 minutes to go and you just want to die. That's not good foreshadowing for MI4. Tom has decided he wants JJ back as a producer (a small relief) and that they are already working on the plot/script. Unless John Woo is directing (MI2 was explosive and loving it) you can count me out of going anywhere near theaters when this is released.

Next, do you remember that movie franchise that everyone loved and then George Lucas came in and just had to make a sequel to "continue the story" (make more money)? No, I'm not talking about Star Wars, I'm talking about Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, the movie so sh*tty it created a new term in the cultural lexicon "nuking the fridge." Similar to TV's "jumping the shark", "nuking the fridge" happens when a movie has passed all believability and really doesn't care anymore. At one point in IJ4 Indiana stumbles upon a nuclear test site and hides in a fridge as a bomb is detonated less than 1000 feet away. After it has exploded he even exits the fridge to create a cool shot filled with radiation poisoning. Besides the fact that the movie just seemed like a ploy to make even more money by introducing Shia LaBeouf as his son (who can't act), it wasted the fans' glorious memories of the three films that came before it, and somehow made Cate Blanchett look like a bad actress (nearly impossible). Not only that, but the "surprise" at the end, where the thing they've been searching for the whole time is revealed, actually turns out to be real aliens, and the "treasure" that Indy has spent the last 90 minutes searching for is knowledge. KNOWLEDGE. Lucas clearly has no respect for movie audiences anymore and Spielberg and Ford must have been, respectively, so far up Lucas's bum and desperately wanting a better retirement pension that they made this movie. And now they're making another one. With Shia to star.

What have we learned? Despite horrible critical reviews and disappointing box office returns (both movies made tons of money but not as much as expected for two proven franchises, especially IJ4), the show will go on for these horrible, horrible ideas. I'm so mad that I don't even want to rent this sure-to-be-pieces-of-garbage. Maybe someday Hollywood will grow a conscience and let things lie in the grave they built for themselves.

Image found via Google.

A New Trend?

Men looking like crap. Joaquin (right) did it for real, Ben Stiller (left) took it and ran with it for laughs, and it appears Philip Seymour Hoffman (below) has perfected it. Really? A beanie at the Oscars? Why did you show up?

My Pick for Best Supporting Actor

These picks are really just a formality, because there is only one name I will accept to hear come Oscar night, and it should be quite obvious. So I have grouped the other four all in the last spot, but still in order, because they in no way come close to my #1.

5d. Philip Seymour Hoffman- Doubt

PSH plays Father Flynn, the priest at the center of the scandal and accusations of pedophilia who is challenged by Meryl's Sister Aloysius. I truly believe he was miscast in this role- I never bought him as a priest and he does not have the acting acumen to go head-to-head with Meryl yet. He is still a wonderful actor, but in the scenes with just the two of them it became painfully obvious how out of his element he was. Even in his scenes at the pulpit preaching, I did not think he had enough power in his voice to command the attention that is necessary for a priest with an audience of hundreds. While I was watching him I was imagining what actors would be better in the role, and that is never a good thing (I settled on Liam Neeson for his voice and stature but am still unsatisfied).

5c. Robert Downey, Jr.- Tropic Thunder

RDJ plays Kirk Lazarus, an Australian hardcore Method actor who undergoes skin pigmentation surgery to become the African American seargent of a Vietnam platoon for a movie. Robert is amazing in the role and it is very different from other characters I've seen him play. Frankly, I'm still amazed he was actually nominated, because Academy members do not love comedies, and it shows you how much they loved RDJ this year to award him for such an unlikely role. Any other year I might be rooting for him simply because it is an outrageous role in an outrageous movie but this year I will try to pick based on merit. He gets to act in a movie within a movie and does it convincingly while wearing blackface, which is nothing short of a miracle. Still, just because he was the best actor in a comedy this year does not make him the winner of BSA, because unfortunately for him this was a great year for dramas and there are three other gentlemen ahead of him.

5b. Michael Shannon- Revolutionary Road

Michael plays John Givings, a mentally challenged neighbor of Kate and Leo in the movie who injects the sole hilarity to the otherwise bleak movie. He was much needed relief, and I wish he was onscreen more. In fact, that is my only problem with his character and the only reason he is not number two, is that he is onscreen for less than twenty minutes in two scenes. During those two scenes however, you forget that this is a movie about Kate and Leo's characters; in fact, you forget altogether that they are in the movie. He steals the scenes with flying colors and I look forward to seeing him in more movies.

5a. Josh Brolin- Milk

Josh plays Dan White, the assassin of Sean Penn's Harvey Milk in the titular movie. Josh has had an incredible two years, and I am still miffed he was not nominated last year in this category (or lead, who knows) for No Country for Old Men. He plays this role quietly but with visibly bubbling aggression and frustration- over not being the star of the city council and not being able to be the man he thinks his family needs. Brolin is perfect for the role and is a near doppelganger for the actual man, but at this point either he needs a strong lead role to win an Oscar or I am afraid he will become the new Johnny Depp or Christian Bale, who consistently turn out incredible performances but rarely are awarded for them. This is not the role he will win an Oscar for, but I am excited he was nominated just the same.

1. Heath Ledger- The Dark Knight

Heath plays The Joker, who menaces Batman and Gotham City through utter chaos and anarchy with no real plan or weaknesses in sight. I've already shared my thoughts about Heath's performance and my parasocial history with him as the first post on my blog here, but I really cannot say enough about this performance. That he erased Jack Nicholson's performance with a single photo is nothing to sneer at, and that he has redefined the popcorn summer blockbuster also helps. Of all my choices, his win is most important to me and likewise his is the only one that will affect me adversely if he loses.

Images found via Google Images.